实例解析:托福满分作文模板到底该怎么用

来源:互联网 作者:互联网 发布日期:2014年06月16日 10:06

摘要:

托福独立写作模版只是助你更快上手的,而不是拿高分的,高分托福写作一定是有自己的语言特色,希望大家可以通过我的模板总结出自己的模板,这样才能拿到高分的独立写作。

   一个模板刚刚出现,有可能明天就有100个人在用了,你想想当考官看到100个人写出来的作文都用同样的开头的时候,他将会是什么情景。当然这里指的是国外的考官。国内的考官看到的时候可是很爽的,太棒了!又造出来一帮一模一样的学生,加分点明确,可以给分了!

  当面对重重阻力的时候,很多人不禁产生了怀疑。我们是否应该使用模板?使用模板是否会导致低分?我们到底该用什么模板?其实答案很简单,模板应该用,必须用,大胆用!

  但是有一个十分重要的前提性条件,那就是模板一定是要原创的!原创的?!开玩笑,我们这辈子从来就没自己思考过,一直都是老师喂到我们嘴里的!是的,这就是你一直咒骂中国式教育的起点。其实很多满分作文都是使用了模板,但是由于使用的十分之精巧,同时再加上是原创托福作文模板,因此连考官也拿他没有办法,人家写的就是棒吗!

  OK,先来看两段例子!第一段是不好的例子,第二段是好的例子。

  Nowadays, thanks to the development of Internet, we are exposed to a vast ocean of information. Some argue that so much information brings a great benefit to our life and study. But for me, the experience with surfing Internet leads me to believe that accessing much information cause more problems than it solves。

  Perhaps no issue in this world is as significance to students as education. Despite various responses people may have on the topic concerning the issue regarding which thing should the education aim at. I, given the chance, prefer to endorse that preparing for careers should have primary consideration。

  当看到第一篇文章的时候,已经没有了当初得的兴奋,因为这样的文章实在是太常见了!首先Nowadays这个单词是被无数老师推崇的“高级”单词。一直无法理解,为什么有的单词会更高级。然后thanks to节宾语,天呐!多么明显的模板!当我往下看的时候,我只能无意识的检查是否有语法错误,没有语法错误的话,我也就只能给个一般的分数就好了。

  但是当看到第二篇文章的时候,初看觉得此文写得不错。用词准确地道,而且完全是自己完成没有模板,但是当我回头再一回味这篇文章的时候,惊讶的发现,这篇文章竟然也是由模板所出!首先Perhaps no issue in this world is as significance to students as education。看似平淡无奇,但是实际上Perhaps no issue in this world is as significance to就是一个模板,更厉害的是下一句!Despite various responses people may have on the topic concerning the issue regarding which thing should the education aim at。这么长的一句话,竟然只有最后3个单词不是模板!

  然后再接下来,下一句的“given the chance, ”其实对于整句话来说根本就没有任何实际上语义的改变!但适当加进来之后,我们会感觉到非常的地道!这篇文章身上完全看不出半点模板的影子,为什么看不出作文模板的影子呢?就是因为这篇文章的模板是完全原创的,哪怕不是原创的,也是仅在小范围内流传的!而且这篇文章后面类似的妙手不计其数!

  托福独立写作模版只是助你更快上手的,而不是拿高分的,高分托福写作一定是有自己的语言特色,希望大家可以通过我的模板总结出自己的模板,这样才能拿到高分的独立写作。

  一、 托福独立写作模版的用法:结构篇

  1、开头

  Sample one(适用于有一些背景or有一个中心词而且编得出来那个quotation的所有情况(二选一,agree or disagree,除了个别);

  On contemporary society(一般的背景)/ With the advent of the technologically advanced society (the information explosive era(与科技有关的背景),XX(中心词) serves as a catalyst for our future success/ XX is synonymous with knowledge and the road to success/XX plays an essential/increasingly important role in…/XX is enjoying an increasingly high popularity among people./很简单的一句背景 , However, people (universities, government, citizen, society, government,) are/is invariably faced with such a question/ can’t help wondering:改写题目1.Confucian (Yu Qiuyu, Mark Twain, William Shakespeare), (one of) the greatest and most influential Chinese philosophers (scholars, educators, writers, thinkers, statesmen), has insightfully commented, “___编____”I cling to an unshakeable belief that his comment gives the answer to this question:改写题目2.

  Among countless factors which contribute to my position are following conspicuous ones(最后一定排比结尾,且如果字数够了这一句就不要)。

  要做的:想一句简单的背景+编一句名言+改写两次题目

  Sample two:(如果sample one的名言编不出来或者不适合编如leisure time,就用下面的)

  On contemporary society(一般的背景)/ With the advent of the technologically advanced society (the information explosive era(与科技有关的背景))/ On account of …,XX(中心词) serves as a catalyst for our future success/ XX is synonymous with knowledge and the road to success/XX plays an essential/increasingly important role in… /XX is enjoying an increasingly high popularity among people./ 很简单的一句背景( 如so…that…/not only…but also). However,when it comes to the choice between AA and BB/When asked about whether改写题目1, people get into a dilemma. According to my personality and experiences/As far as I am concerned/From my perspective, I cling to an unshakeable belief that改写题目2.以下最后决定怎样写:Among countless factors which contribute to my position are following conspicuous ones(最后一定排比结尾)/AA not only…but also(2)/There are various merits AA brings about, first of all, to…; secondly, to…;and lastly…(3)。

  要做的:想一句简单的背景+改写两次题目+总起(最后写)

  2、分点一:分层论证

  Basic to any understanding of the benefits we can get from

  _______ is that__________/ First and foremost,

  On one hand_________, On the other hand_________

  Besides/ What’s more/ In addition。

  这一段主要说理,在分论点里可以加一些小的例子细节,重点是要用一些精华句子!

  3、分点二:举例论证

  Further lending credence to my position is that____________

  (简单阐述/例子字不够就多讲点废话)I can think of no better illustration than the example of(典型例子)/ A case in point is that(不是很典型)________,…。.(例子见后面)

  一句话总结例子:As a result,强调句/倒装句/表利弊的句型/反面论证如果没有会怎样

  4、让步段:

  Agree or disagree: Admittedly,_____,to some extent, may directly or indirectly ____ /has its undeniable detriments. For instance, _______

  However, the valuable merits of_______ considerably overshadow the drawbacks/ on no account________./

  二选一:Admittedly, BB also has certain merits which deserve some words here. For example, ____(字数不够就多讲点) However,BB 的缺点或AA也可以做到. Compared with AA, (which 可以总结所有优点或针对BB的一方面, )it pales。

  5、结尾段:

  Therefore, due to the above mentioned reasons, which sometimes correlate with each other to form an organic whole and thus become more persuasive than any single one of them(字不够了用), I reinforce my stand point that 改写题目3

  Only via(by/through /with/when/after) ___can we__________;

  only via(by/through /with/when/after) ___can we________;

  and only via(by/through /with/when/after)___can we_______

  Or It is A that...;it is A that...;and it is A that.。.(不好写或显得累赘就不要了)

  二、 托福独立写作模版的用法:语言篇

  1、 基本句型

  l 因果

  On account of/owing to/due to+ N

  For the reason that/as/since+句子

  It is due to____that

  eg:It is due to his persistence and perseverance that he eventually reached his acme。(强调句)

  derive/arise/stem from来源于

  eg:His success derives from his persistence and perseverance。

  ascribe A to B 归结于

  eg: His success can be ascribed/attributed to his persistence and perseverance

  l 条件

  A serves as a catalyst for B(our further success)

  If/on condition that/provided that/as long as________

  l 让步

  Despite the fact that/regardless of

  2、 经典句型

  l 倒装

  1) Only via(by/through /with/when/after) __do/did/can we__

  ef: Only after going to the beach of Hawaii will I know about American typical type of spending leisure time。

  2) Hardly/Seldom/Scarcely can__

  ef: Hardly can we imagine a world/our life without/devoid of

  3) So +adj+主谓倒装+that__

  4) Not only 主谓倒装 but also.。.

  eg: Not only should education prepare children to compete

  Not only do people care their economic needs,they but also want to meet their spiritual needs。

  5) On no account 主谓倒装(决不..。.)

  l 强调

  It is/was....that/who(m)..。.

  l 插入语

  1) 限定性副词 probably/directly or indirectly/to some(a large) extent

  2) N+,ving,+v

  3) 同位语

  3、经典中的经典

  l 排比

  1) It is tourism that gives me the opportunity to know the culture of this dynamic, robust and alive country。

  2) It is computers that make our life diverse,convenient,dynamic/ vibrant, without which our life would probably pale。

  3) A/which needs to be/In this way, A can be readily accepted, respected,appreciated and advocated。

  4) Only via university education can we have systematic knowledge concerning arts and science.Only via university education can we know the essence of symbiosis and collaboration. And Only via university education can we meet the demands of society and make our future success inevitable。

  l 十大副词

  1) Considerably

  2) Invariably

  3) Undoubtedly/indisputably/incontrovertibly

  4) Increasingly

  5) Most/exceedingly/exceptionally 格外地

  6) Insightfully 富有见底地

  7) Regrettably

  8) Effectively and efficiently

  9) Gradually and eventually

  10) Readily

  l 其他

  1) It is not difficult for us to imagine that 不难想象

  2) B makes it possible for us to have an universal access to A/A is readily available. A容易得到

  3) In order to survive and thrive in this fiercely competitive society, people have no choice but to work and study hard。

  4) Ruthless and relentless无形/fierce and intense competition

  The ruthless and relentless competition imposes an unprecedented pressure on each and every individual, and therefore,there is no exaggeration to say that our innovative and inventive ability can lay a solid foundation for our future, enabling us to survive and thrive in the modern world。

  5) Inspiration, aspiration and perspiration

  6) Vision,passion and mission

  7) 其他词语见最后清单p120

  三、托福独立写作模版的用法:论证篇

  1、模糊论证

  Range from.。.

  举例论证

  l 自己的例子

  I can think of no better illustration than the example of my own visit to Singapore. Only after going shopping on Orchard road, the main shopping district in Singapore,did I realize what "a paradise for shopping"really was. Only after roaming in the City Hall,the financial center of Singapore, did I experience the quick pace of modern life. Only after lying on the beach of Sentosa did I know about the Singaporean typical way of spending leisure time。

  l 名人的例子(Yu Minghong,。。。)

  l 社会的例子

  For example, on account of the advent of the technologically advanced society, employers tend to hire people equipped with a wide range of knowledge rather than the ones with limited knowledge。

  l 瞎编的例子

  2、数据论证

  I can think of no better illustration than the statistic. Experts from the Department of Sociology in Peking University pointed out that the average sleeping time an adult has everyday, compared with 8 hours in the 1970s, has decreased to 6.8 hours due to the busy work and study。

  3、引用论证(开头)

  4、假想论证

  Imagine/visualize/picture/suppose ..。.

  在备考托福写作时,一些好的句型是必不可少的,下面整理了一些经典句子,希望能够帮到同学们。

  托福写作精选句型:

  1. Life is not fair, get used to it。

  2. The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself。

  3. You will not make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice president with a car, until you earn both。

  4. If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure。

  5. Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunity。

  6. If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them。

  7. Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to your talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try "delousing" the closet in your own room。

  8. Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades; they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to anything in real life。

  9. Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time。

  10. Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs。

  托福写作精选句型 - 参考译文:

  1. 生活是不公平的,你要去适应它。

  2. 这个世界并不会在意你的自尊,而是要求你在自我感觉良好之前先有所成就。

  3. 刚从学校走出来的时候不可能一年挣4万美元,更不会成为哪家公司的副总裁,还拥有一部汽车,直到你将这些都挣到手的那一天。

  4. 如果你认为学校里的老师过于严厉,那么等你有了老板再回头想一想。

  5. 卖汉堡包并不会有损于你的尊严。你的祖父对卖汉堡包有着不同的理解,他们称之为“机遇”。

  6. 如果你陷入困境,那不是你父母的过错,不要将你理应承担的责任转嫁给他人,而要学着从中吸取教训。

  7. 在你出生之前,你的父母并不像现在这样乏味。他们变成今天这个样子是因为这些年来一直为你付账单,给你洗衣服,听你谈你有多酷。所以,在对父母喋喋不休之前,还是先去打扫一下你自己的屋子吧。

  8. 你所在学校也许已经不再分优等生和劣等生,但生活并不如此。在某些学校已经有了“不及格”的概念,学校会不断地给你机会让你进步,然而现实生活完全不是这样的。

  9. 走出学校后的生活不像在学校一样有学期之分,也没有暑假之说。没有几位老板乐于帮你发现自我,你必须依靠自己去完成。

  10. 电视中的许多场景决不是真实的生活。在现实生活中,人们必须埋头做自己的工作,而并不像电视里演的那样天天泡在咖啡馆里。

 
燕定美中教育托福暑期班课
高中生正式进入“洋高考”
 
 

免费评估咨询

姓名 GPA
学校 TOEFL
SAT GRE GMAT
电话 申请类别
Email 申请专业
      红色边框为必填项目